Boards of directors play a critical role in guiding their organizations toward long-term success. But to lead effectively, they must first earn and sustain the trust of fellow board members, employees, and other key stakeholders.
In theory, that might seem straightforward. But in reality, building trust isn’t always easy.
As humans, we make quick judgments about someone’s trustworthiness within minutes of meeting them. Furthermore, while acting with integrity and keeping promises is essential, it doesn’t guarantee others will perceive you as trustworthy.
Author, speaker, and professor Andrew Sykes joined us for a recent ATLAS Leadership Series webinar to explore why trust is essential in the boardroom – and how to earn it. He shared practical insights on how to:
- Identify “trust holes” in board interactions and develop strategies to close them.
- Understand the science behind building instant identity trust and how to strengthen it over time.
- Apply proven trust-building principles to foster a high-performing board grounded in integrity, reliability, and solid relationships.
In this post, we share top takeaways from this insightful session.
First Impressions are Critical
Sykes opened the session with a story from the early days of his career. At age 21, Sykes started his first business and soon landed a high-stakes meeting that he believed could “put us on the map.”
Confident he nailed it, Sykes left the meeting expecting to win the deal. However, the company didn’t hire him.
“I had blown it by walking in with the arrogance of a 21-year-old know-it-all,” he explained. “I blew my first impression.”
This experience became a powerful lesson in the importance of first impressions. “Being worthy of trust and being perceived as trustworthy by another person are two different things,” he reflected.
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There is a Trust Gap
Sykes polled attendees to gauge their level of trust in various individuals, including strangers on the street, coworkers, family, and friends. The responses reinforced a key insight: “The more we know people, the more we trust them.”
Yet, broadly speaking, leaders (including board members) are often not perceived as trustworthy. “On average, people trust leaders less than they trust a stranger on the street,” explained Sykes.
This isn’t necessarily because board directors lack integrity. Rather, it’s the result of a trust gap.
“You believe you are a trustworthy human being. You tell the truth, act with good intentions, and generally keep your promises. That deserves trust,” Sykes said. “The problem is, trustworthiness is a judgment that other people make about you in the milliseconds to minutes when they first meet you, based on the micro-moments rather than grand gestures.”
The core issue is the gap between how trustworthy board directors know themselves to be and how quickly others form judgments – sometimes before directors truly have an opportunity to demonstrate their integrity.
Who We Trust Determines What We Believe
Only a fraction of what we know comes from firsthand experience. The vast majority comes from what others share with us.
“First, we decide whom to trust, and that determines what we believe,” said Sykes.
When someone trusts you, they’re far more likely to accept your ideas and act on your advice. But without that trust, even your most valuable insights will likely be ignored or dismissed.
“As board members, we have one critical job that affects everything else we do: figuring out how to be judged as a trustworthy human being in the first five minutes when we meet someone,” said Sykes.
Board Directors Must Climb Out of a Trust Hole
Many people see trust-building as a long, gradual journey. But often, the reason it seems to take time to build isn’t because trust naturally develops slowly. Instead, it’s because board directors start with a deficit, stuck in what Sykes refers to as a “trust hole.”
“Most of us trust leaders and board members less than the average stranger on the street,” Sykes explained. “Because of your position, you’re in a trust hole before you even open your mouth.”
Why do people distrust leaders? Often, it stems from the perception that board directors may have hidden agendas or are acting in their own interest.
“While we think we’re building trust over time, what we’re really doing is climbing out of a trust hole,” explained Sykes. “This is an enormous trust issue – but it’s also an enormous trustworthiness opportunity. If you can understand how people judge trustworthiness and the false signals they use, we can use that to our advantage to demonstrate our trustworthiness.”
Trustworthiness is a Formula
According to Sykes, people ask themselves 3 questions when they meet someone new:
- Sincerity: Can I believe you?
- Competence: Can you do it?
- Reliability: Have you done it before?
“Trustworthiness is the product of these three things,” he explained. “If any one of these three things is judged to be zero, there is no trustworthiness. Is it fair? No. But it’s how people work.”
Polish Your Origin Story to Make a Lasting First Impression
In many meetings, there comes a point where someone says, “Let’s go around the room and introduce ourselves.” According to Sykes, this opportunity is often wasted. “Most of us make it up as we go along, and we blow an opportunity to build trust,” he said.
A strong introduction shouldn’t just tell people your name and title. It should also help them understand who you are, what drives you, and why you are trustworthy. To do that, Sykes suggests crafting an “origin story” that includes 3 elements:
- The credible past: This answers the question, “What were you doing before?” It provides context and establishes credibility. An example is: “I’ve had the honor of working for five of the leading law firms over the three decades of my career.”
- The poignant pivot: This reveals your motive or turning point. It’s what shifted your perspective or inspired your current path. An example is: “I was the CEO of a manufacturing company for 25 years. I realized there was a big disconnect between the board’s vision and what frontline employees understood the strategy to be.”
- The inspiring now: This brings your story to the present and illustrates the impact you’re working to make. An example is: “Today, I have the privilege of sitting on the ABC board and bringing life-saving medications to the people who need them most.”
Perfecting your “origin story” takes time, but is well worth it. It’s one of the most powerful tools for earning trust quickly and meaningfully.
Expectations are Often Unspoken
It’s easy to assume that simply keeping your promises will earn you trust. But often, that’s not the case.
“People don’t judge us based on whether we keep our promises,” said Sykes. “They judge us based on whether or not we meet their expectations – even if they haven’t shared those expectations.”
To address this gap, Sykes recommends the “responsible promise habit.” “It’s the antidote to being judged based on unclear expectations of you,” he said. “And it’s your secret weapon to becoming the most trustworthy human on the planet.
There are 3 elements of a responsible promise:
- Conditions of satisfaction: We can upgrade the quality of our promises by being clear about the conditions that need to be true for the person to whom we’re making the promise to be satisfied. That can include things like:
- Who will do what
- What you’ll each do
- Why you’ll do it
- When you’ll do it by
- How you’ll do it
- Expectations of you: By simply asking, “What else do you expect from me?” you can uncover important, often unspoken expectations, like:
- Quality standards
- Use of formats and logos
- Updates on progress
- Confidentiality
- Expectations of your way of being: People often have unspoken expectations related to how you show up, including things like:
- Attitude
- Presence
- Manners
- Communication style
“Being the most trustworthy board member begins by designing, practicing, and polishing a personal origin story and your first impression,” said Sykes. “People will judge you in the milliseconds to minutes when they first meet you and that impression will last through time. It’s difficult to change.”
The second chance to earn performance trust lies in how we make and keep our promises.
We often make promises sloppily – without explaining why,” Sykes concluded. “But people care deeply about our motives. Also, clarify expectations. That’s your secret weapon.”
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About The Author
- Adam Wire is a Content Marketing Manager at OnBoard who joined the company in 2021. A Ball State University graduate, Adam worked in various content marketing roles at Angi, USA Football, and Adult & Child Health following a 12-year career in newspapers. His favorite part of the job is problem-solving and helping teammates achieve their goals. He lives in Indianapolis with his wife and two dogs. He’s an avid sports fan and foodie who also enjoys lawn and yard work and running.
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